Monday, November 28, 2005

Today...


It's cold, it's wet, it's already dark... We saw our first few snowflakes today, which is fairly rare this early in the year here. Generally we get an inch or so of snow for a day in Janurary, it closes everything down till the next day when it melts.
It's in introspective kind of day and I've been poking around in my own blog some. It's a little like poking around in the junk drawer at home. You find stuff that you had forgotten all about; it's like "God, I forgot I even had that!" It was kind of fun! I re-read a post I did on Father's Day in rememberance of my Dad. My Dad was an interesting man, he was loving and giving and moral on the one hand, but on the other he was mean and abusive, not out of hate, but out of ingorance. He always did the best he could, he wasn't taught how to parent from his parents and he grew up in a time when people just didn't talk about such things, it was best just to deal with your lot in life and it did little good to complain. He grew up during the depression and fought in WWII, his childhood home had no electricity or indoor plumbing, he was a tough, no nonsense kind of guy. In his world survival equaled success. We had a few issues, he and I. We hadn't entirely worked through them all before he passed. Of all of the things I've ever doubted, I never doubted my Father's love, even during the darkest of times...
That might not make sense to everyone reading, but it makes perfect sense to me.
My favorite post about him was the one in which he visited me in a dream, after he'd passed and all of our "issues" were put to rest once and for all.
.

posted by addict @ 3:54 PM |

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