Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Sad little man...

While shopping at the grocery store, rather late one night, I heard a man behind me; "Addict?" I turn around to find a shortish middle aged man, my first impression was that time had not been kind to him. He was slumped, wearing older clothing, paunchy and trying hard to hide the fact that he was balding. I looked at his face, quickly searching my memory to figure out who this guy was. We engaged in the usual small talk, 'how have you been? What have you been up to?'... I was embarassed that I could not immediatly place the face. I've run into people from my colorful past and have found that some people remain remarkably the same and others have changed drastically over the years... this person has appearently changed, I searched our conversation for hints as to his identity while we were talking.

Years ago I lived with a guy who eventually became one of my worst nightmares... he was a cocaine dealer and lived the flashy lifestyle that went hand in hand with his profession. As these stories go, things went bad... I finally got to the point where the "lifestyle" was not worth the price and breaking away from this guy was difficult. He was possessive, parinoid, aggressive and armed... during this time of my life, all of these things were "normal".

I realized the man in the store was this monster from my past, standing in the produce section, small and sad.

Driving home I realized how much my life has changed and I was thankful. Regret came to me in a wave for the garbage I drug my children through in their younger years.
Mostly though, I realized that terrifying monsters lurking in the dark become harmless when you step into the light...
eventually you almost feel sorry for them.

posted by addict @ 9:43 PM |

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